Crosby, Stills, Nash, and Young’s Déjà vu is one of the best records of all time.
I find myself usually apologizing at some point in every blog post, but this time I am sorry for not having posted sooner, my family’s internet has been done for over a week. My school has internet, which I have used a few times, but what usually happens is I wait for half an hour while another teacher uses Instant Messenger to probably talk to someone who lives in the same town, then I get on line for about 5 minutes and at least one or two teachers end up crowding around me while I am on the computer, and ask me everything I am looking up, and watch me write emails. It makes me uncomfortable. Respecting one’s personal space isn’t exactly the same in America as it is in Kazakhstan. (Don’t Touch Me!!). Anyway, I realize this could be something I just have to get accustomed to. I think the list of those things is only going to grow for the time being. I’ve gotten my teaching schedule and will be teaching grades 5th through 10th (schools here only go to 11th grade).
Now that I am settling in a little more, and getting more used to the situation I am in, and realizing that things take TIME, I am beginning to feel a little better. This past week has been really difficult because I am still “observing” Akmaral teach lessons, I have lost my wallet, my school will not give my copies of the textbooks, and even the absolute BEST English speakers I have access to still don’t understand what I am saying most of the time.
Still observing Akmaral teach is difficult, because I see openings that I could have and more or less have to sit there, and watch them close. Things are basically spoon fed to the students, and often directly translated for them. The majority of even the upper level English classes are taught in Kazakh. This is something I plan on changing when given the opportunity, but for now have to learn to deal with.
Not having a wallet is scarier from the lack of “emergency” money standpoint than I am afraid of people using my credit cards (I have never seen anyone pay for anything with a credit card here). The thing that is scary is now the only money I have access to is about $300 cash I keep in my house. I have not lost my Peace Corps debit card, so I will still be able to get my living allowances, but that is all. It’s not a disaster, and I am over the initial feeling of loss.
Not having someone to communicate with in my community has been really difficult. My counterpart and some of the other teachers speak English fairly well, but there are still a ton of concepts I can not explain to anyone. Obviously it goes both ways, I should know their languages better too. The other thing that is difficult about my town, is there is very little to do/look forward to doing. On weekends I basically read, watch movies on my computer, and play guitar. There are no museums, sights, or really anything cultural for me to look forward to or experience on the weekends, which is frustrating. The situations which frustrate me are basically endless, but I am trying to shake them off.
Apparently in my school there is a thing called “duty”, basically where each teacher is a hall safety for some period of time throughout the week. On my first real day of school one of the assistant principles decided that my day should be Fridays from 3:00 until 6:30, (my last class ends at 12:30 Fridays, so this struck me as total tripe). As it was explained to me by Akmaral, my job was to stand out in the hallway between bells from 3-6 and make sure the students behaved, which I did. Apparently though, there was more to that, which I did not know. Later in the day, the same assistant principle came to me visibly mad with a notebook.
She then talked to me in incredibly fast Russian and tried to make me look like a jackass in front of the students, other teachers, and janitors, by pretending to kick plans on our stairwell, and keeping asking me “Ponul?” (Understood? in Russian). Not knowing a better thing to do I began to speak to her in English as fast as I possibly could (even though she speaks no English) to emphasize a point. Later, when I cooled down I laughed that I replied to her in English.
After being frustrated I called Peace Corps, and guess what my school is no longer going to ask me to do on Friday evenings…..thank you for confusing the words “Volunteer” and “Slave”, school.
At first I was reluctant about that situation and getting PC involved, but it was the right thing to do. I don’t want my school to think anytime something doesn’t go my way I will call PC, but I do want them to realize that there are things I am there to do and a lot of things I am not there to do. It was good to put my foot down and will prevent me from being walked on in the future. I am more than willing to have an after school club or something beneficial to the students at that time on Fridays, but I’m not going to watch their hallways because someone else wants Friday evenings off.
Saturday I was invited to a teacher’s son’s wedding. I was pretty excited because I had never been to a Kazakh wedding (or really even that many American weddings). It an experience and definitely the type of moment that makes me realize where I am once again. The evening had a mix of Kazakh traditions where the bride is brought in the room with her face covered and people sing to her, give her money, and pick her up and put her down a few times. At one point a 60 year old Kazakh woman said to me “I love you.” I didn’t know how to react; I think it is probably one of 3 English phrases she knows.
After the eating, each table is called up to a microphone to wish the newly married couple well. Each person from every table is expected to say something. When my table was called I saw a slight grin on each of the 200 people’s faces in the room. I even heard the Emcee say something like ‘Oh, this is the table with the American.” I knew this was my time to do something. As expected, I was passed the microphone last of anyone seated at my table. Once in hand I said the name of the bride and groom paused for a second or two for effect and said “Be Happy” in Kazakh. I have never heard more people go crazy for someone only saying 4 words. The wedding was very nice, I couldn’t help but feeling happy for these people, even though I had never met them. I was thankful for being invited to their wedding, and excited for all the hopefully great things they will get to do together in their lifetimes. On the other hand, I was regretful that Abby is on the other side of the world while I do this, and honestly….I want to have our wedding soon, so watching other people marry makes me a touch jealous. The new pics are of my school, my town, my house, the wedding, etc. Enjoy.
Thank you all, and I hope to hear from you soon. Have a great Thanksgiving.
Love,
Nick.
PS….if anyone has the desire to overnight a pumpkin pie and some whipped cream to Kazakhstan…I know a guy who’s blog you just read who would love one.
“He had learned still another new and comforting truth-that there is nothing in the world to be dreaded. He had learned that just as there is no condition in which man can be happy and entirely free, so there is no condition in which he need be unhappy and not free. He has learned that suffering and freedom both have their limits and that these limits are soon reached. The harder his condition became and the more grim the future, the more independent of that condition in which he found himself were the joyful and comforting thoughts, memories, and fantasies that came to him”
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